Sunday, 04 January 2009
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It's been 3 years since I've dated anyone. I'm only just now getting over Cody, and he wasn't even the guy I dated 3 years ago, just a causal thing turned love-story. There's a guy I work with, he's on security. I apparently have been so out of touch with a guy actually flirting with me that I didn't realize that he was doing just that. He's older than I am, which I like, attractive, and has a great personality. Now the con's, he's married, and also talking to my supervisor, who is a good friend. Yesterday I just thought that he was being friendly, just a joke, by pulling on my jacket and sayin okay I will when the guard opened the slider and told him to take the trash out (which is what I was doin). We both laughed, sooo it sounds friendly right? Harmless. Right? I have a problem with saying too much, and I thought it was funny so I shared when I got back to the unit. Angela tried to cover up the fact that she obviously read more into it than I did at the time. As I was leaving today, I passed him and he playfully shoved me with a grin on his face.
I'm not really sure how to deal with this. Flirt back? Ignore it? Tell Angela? Tell him to quit?
If I flirt back, not only will I end up back the same way I was 6 months ago, but it will hurt Angela.
Ignoring it might just make it worse, but it might make it go away I suppose.
Angela would flip if I told her, maybe I'll tell Lauri or Juanda, or maybe I won't tell anyone I work with.
Like I would really tell him to quit, I LOVE the attention. It's much needed, I just wish there were different circumstances.
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Comments (6)
Attention is such a double-edged sword for women. Women need beauty, care, and attention, just as men need respect, honor, and to feel wanted and as if they accomplish things.
Basically, I'd tell you that you can do better.
Try going to new places or finding new friends by other means. By your picture, you appear to be a normal-looking young woman; you deserve an unattached, normal-looking man around your age. Don't settle for less--those relationships have quick highs, but the fall is very painful. What if you split up this man from his family somehow, and then he turns around and leaves you later? Oh, I know you wouldn't want to, but these things happen. 
I don't mean to scare you--I'm just concerned for you, person I've never met.
@GreekPhysique - lol that last part made me laugh 'concerned for you-person ive never met'. yeah i dont think that im going to go anywhere with it. i dont want my friend, who is also my supervisor at work, to get hurt just because he flirts with me also. what u said was nice, thank you. i live in a small town, so its not very easy to meet new ppl, and im not the most social person. but i dont think that i could hurt my friend like that, and ur right i dont want to break up a marriage.
@paige089 - I'm glad you're not going anywhere with it.
Yes, you're right, it makes it harder to meet new people in a small town. Perhaps you could try an Internet dating service? While you do have to be cautious, I know plentyoffish.com is free. Or, even better, is there a friend who lives in a big town that you could go visit, or a friend who could introduce you to more guys? See, a good trick is for friends to help friends and give each other bigger friend lists and options that way.
@GreekPhysique - well 2 of the girls i work with were talking about guys they know that they want me to meet. im probably going to meet one of them idk lol. i have a pretty dangerous job, which has made me very cautious outside of work as well. and im already a naturally jumpy person lol, so i dont think that using an online dating service is for me, id never take it from the internet, id be too nervous to meet them anywhere. i have heard of plentyoffish though, Christian dating right?
@paige089 - Plentyoffish.com is not Christian, but it is free. For Christians, there are other sites, like eHarmony, which is a paid site, and I think there are some free sites too. But that's fine--by all means, I think it's better that you meet those boys that someone knows, as long as they sound safe (no 30-somethings! ha).
If you are interested in Christian dating, is there some sort of college in town with a Christian group? That might be a good place to hang out, even if you're not in college.
@GreekPhysique - oh i just thought that thats what plentyoffish was. i must be thinking of some other site. it wasnt eharmony or match, it was one i hadnt heard of except in a search engine. i agree with the 30somethings lol. i think ive decided that 28 is the limit, and thats still pushing it. most of my friends these days are from work, so my selection of guys closer to my age is pretty narrow. the youngest friend that works out there is still 24.